I read somewhere, wish I could remember where but it's all a blur. A part of me believes I can and could if only I would, ... take the time. That I'd remember.




I read sometimes you have to tell a lie in order to reveal the truth.
I like that.



I write
a lot.
I'm never at a loss
when it comes to talk.

Truth is,
I love silence.


























Exactly.
And would prefer my art to speak for me.





But I feel as if we live in a society where saying no to words is just not done. And so I talk,
and often a lot. It's sort of like a nerous tick,
or something.





I'm learnin' to live with it while I "deal."





The lines between art and life are beginning to blur. And I pray the joy and freedom expressed in my work, continues to express itself through me, the new paintbrush. Society, the new software program. The intention: a bit different from my art.

To enjoy myself, completely, consistently (sans interruption) and amazingly.

I am deserving.
All necessary permissions are granted.






Blogging is a gift.
And so write again I see fit.
Ah yes at times I think to delete it all and quit.
But,
well, there's something so beautiful about revealing your true spirit, essence and soul.


Photos, writing, digital canvases, cooking, quiet and then not at all quiet times alone ...
and social interaction.






"I'm very defensive" I said to Ezra, a young man of 28 whom I met outside the library. He was playing an Australian musical instrument, and I dug the sound of it. That's how we began talking.
"You have ever right to be." he replied. "You're a beautiful, attractive woman."

:)
shees :)


The compliment aside, I felt .. redeemed. vindicated. justified. ah, affirmed.

I've been defensive all my life and now I understand that's totally appropriate.





Good then.








But what does any of this have to do with art? I don't know. But it does. What's art if not to channel the human spirit? I love, that when I'm creating art, there's no one over my shoulder telling me what to do. I'm learning how to do this in "real life" too.


I won't apologize for being in appropriate anymore. Nor for burying myself in my work.

echos
"you're either fully in, or not at all."
there's no toe in the water business going on.

so long as i know it's safe.
safety first.
enjoyment and pleasure follow.






i used to write like an insane woman, all a steady stream of words
and now?

i ask myself
to what end
what's the intention

and for the life of me, i don't know
except that i'm here.
and a part of me continues to enjoy it so.










damn, if i'm not like dori in "finding nemo".
i'd forget who i was if....


huh.


lol.




if
um
huh.




moving on along..........


how do we know who we are?

my response to that is:
i am.


i am
i was
i will be.


simple, see?





but why publish? publishing changes things, to be sure.

i get it.
still doesn't answer the question of "what for?"




damn, that's right
shees :)




to enjoy my company immensely, continuosly, repeatedly, preferably simply yet deeply and for sure genuinely.
to enjoy my self.





perhaps the need to repeat is a nervous tick too.





I'm learnin' to live with it while I "deal."





The lines between art and life are beginning to blur. And I pray the joy and freedom expressed in my work, continues to express itself through me, the new paintbrush. Society, the new software program. The intention: a bit different from my art.

To enjoy myself, completely, consistently (sans interruption) and amazingly.

I am deserving.
All necessary permissions are granted.